Redbook knows good sex—and we've got the library to prove it. We compiled the hottest tips, sultriest bedroom moves, and most surprising advice so you can shake up your between-the-sheets routine.
MAKE A SEX BUCKET LIST
You make a grocery list every week, so why not do the same for your sex life? "Be daring and spontaneous," says sexologist and podcast host Emily Morse. Make a numbered list of the things you and your husband want to try and set a date for when you want to accomplish those goals by. "What matters is the thrill of new places and new moves to go with them. You can't revert back to old-fashioned missionary when you're doing it in a cramped shower stall," explains Morse.
Try these 10 ways to have better sex and have more fun every time you hit the sheets.
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CREATE A SECRET SEX CODE
It could be as simple as, "Come tuck me in" or "You have homework," but making up a few sexy code words you can text throughout the day can be really beneficial to your relationship. Couples who use just-between-us language are happier in their relationship than couples who don't, according to a study published in the Journal of Social And Personal Relationships.
SHOW OFF THEM BEAUTIFUL FEET
Believe it or not, men do want foreplay action. In fact, research shows that they want at least 18 minutes of it, while we all thought they only wanted 13, according to Judy Dutton, author of REDBOOK's 500 Sex Tips. And we're not just talkin' kissing and oral sex. Turns out, men really love a good game of footsie to get the night started on the right foot. "My wife, Laura, plays a world-
DANCE YOUR WAY TO A BETTER ORGASM
Well, sort of. Start in an upright position with your knees on the ground and your shoulders over your hips. Lean back slowly as you squeeze your abs and glutes. Raise your arms up and sit all the way down so that your butt touches your heels. Then, quickly lift back up, leading with your hips and bringing your arms back down to your sides. This move not only will intensify
SWEAT IT OUT
Keeping the A.C. off sets the stage for some seriously hot sex…literally. "Sweating enhances the production of pheromones, chemicals designed by the body to attract and arouse the best mate," says Kathleen Duffy, an aroma therapist and the owner of Herbarium, an herbal store in Massachusetts. "So amplifying your own unique scent through sweating will turn him on."
GET YOUR ABS IN SHAPE
Kegels aren't the only toning exercise you should be doing to maximize your pleasure down there. Turns out your abdomen, lower back, and even butt muscles help you better position your pelvis during sex, says Barbara Keesling, M.D., author of Discover Your Sensual Potential. For example, when you're on your back with your legs bent upwards, your vaginal canal is shortened.
TRY A VARIATION OF YOUR FAVORITE SEX POSITION
Every couple has a go-to sex move…and it's usually missionary. Add a fun twist to the classic position by squeezing your legs together so that his thighs are straddling yours when he enters you. The snugger fit will make your vagina feel tighter, his penis feel bigger, and create a whole lot of friction fun you both will enjoy, says Judy Dutton, author of REDBOOK's 500 Sex Tips book.
FLEX YOUR FLIRT MUSCLE
Sharing a flirty smile with the sexy grocer can give you a confidence boost and translate to an even hotter sex life with your husband between the sheets. "When you're in a trusting relationship, you can flirt in a harmless way," says Ian Kerner, M.D., author of Sex Recharge. "I call it 'transferable sexual esteem,' when you get a charge and bring those feelings home to your guy." Just keep it PG and you're all good..
BEAT BELLY BLOAT FASTER
Ever find yourself in the mood after date night but not really in the mood because you just ate a huge dinner? Take matters into your own hands—literally. "Light pressure on your belly can help speed digestion along and help you process that bloated feeling…so rub your stomach in a reverse 'C' motion in the shower," says Kat Van Kirk, Ph.D., a renowned sexologist and author of The Married Sex Solution: A Realistic Guide To Saving Your Sex Life. You'll feel less sluggish and more sexy in no time.
TAKE SOME MUCH-DESERVED BREAKS
During foreplay and oral sex, make sure you rest a bit in between all the action. Awkward angles and pain make it hard to actually enjoy giving him a BJ, so don't be afraid to regroup for a few seconds, says Amy Marsh, a Berkeley, CA-based sexologist.
CATCH MORE ZZZS FOR MORE OS
It sounds like a no-brainer, but you'd be surprised at what new research has revealed about just how much sleep deprivation can screw with your, well, screwing. Aside from being too tired to get down to business, the study found that not getting enough sleep affects your ability to get excited down there at all. Bottom line: try to get as much shut-eye as your hectic schedule allows so your sex life doesn't suffer.
KEEP YOUR FEET WARM AT ALL TIMES FOR MAXIMUM PLEASURE
The next time your husband laughs at those fuzzy pink socks that Santa puts in your stocking every year, go ahead and tell him this: those socks are actually keeping you stimulated. One study revealed that a couple's chance of climaxing increases by 80 percent when they're wearing socks because they're more comfortable. So go ahead, leave those puppies on.
For those moments when you intellectually know you want to get down, or at the very least, that you should, but you're just not feeling it, we have you covered with these ten tips.
TAKE A TANTRIC RETREAT TOGETHER
Before you freak out, you should probably know that these aren't orgies (phew) and don't include any awkward demonstrations, according to tantra teacher Katrina Bos. Tantric sex classes are all about teaching couples how they can build a strong bond every time they hit the sheets. Topics covered in the "tantric sex syllabus," if you will, include how to touch someone tantrically versus normally, how to truly relax and let go of all fears with your partner, and how to tap into stores of intense energy and move them around your bodies through physical touch and emotional connection. Once you've got these skills down pat, you'll know how to have the mind-blowing sex you've always wanted, says Bos. "We know these fireworks are possible and tantric sex allows you to get the fireworks in the bedroom and more."
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